Anyone remember this infamous line from Shakespeare’s play, Julius Caesar? When Caesar is being stabbed to death, he notices that one of the people who have participated in his impending demise is someone he recognizes. Actually, it was his “friend,” Brutus. The line translates in English to “you too Brutus?” It was definitely a heavy moment in the play and definitely one that stuck in my memory from my high school AP Literature class because that was the first and last time I watched the play but I have never forgotten that line. The betrayal and disappointment Caesar must have felt, like, talk about the wrong time to realize you made poor character choices. Seriously, it’s tough.
Here’s the reality, this is a tale as old as time. For Caesar, it was Brutus. For Jesus it was Judas. For Mitch it was Rico (hint: this is a 2002 movie reference, just google it if it doesn’t sound familiar). The point is, sometimes, even as adults we choose individuals to make a part of tribe. To attach ourselves to and do life with and because they are “our people,” we don’t think twice about who they have the potential to be against us. We trust them with our lives, secrets, families-whatever. But, what happens when that relationship has died or is cut off like a cell phone out of range? No warning. No signs. Just gone.
In my thirties, I must admit, I wasn’t prepared for this occurrence. I thought that my people at this point are my people and we were basically going to die of old age together. But the reality is the chronological time is not indicative of the quality of a relationship. Both parties change and over time, it’s safe to say that the growing process could lead to different paths. Let me be honest, I was definitely NOT okay with that realization when all of this first came about for me. Truthfully, I mourned. It felt like someone I loved had died and the space they once had in my life was gone. I went through all of the stages of grief and added an extra stage that consisted of high levels of pettiness and shade. My screenshot folder in my phone was like I had a consistent diet of spa-petty and meatballs but I made it a point not to publicly act out. I didn’t want to hurt the people or myself in an open forum.
Now, as time and refocusing has helped to heal some wounds and mend some of the gapping holes caused my those events, I can’t help but to truly be saddened by ole Julius Caesar. See, I get the opportunity to move forward. Analyze and observe new and old relationships with fresh eyes and most importantly, live. He, died looking at his assassins, the company of which included a trusted friend. What’s the point you ask? Yes, people change and circumstances can hurt. People, all of us are human. But, there is always hope. There is always love to be given and received, even when it seems to have been taken away unwarranted. And even in the darkest moments, we are never alone. Because The One who gave us life and love also promised to never leave or forsake us!